Joke of the Day

[Rackaddict]

The Iraqi Ambassador to the UN just finished giving a speech, and walked out into the lobby where he met President Bush.

They shook hands and as they walked the Iraqi said, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America."

President Bush said, "Well, anything I can do to help you, I will."

The Iraqi whispered, "My son watches this show 'Star Trek' and in it there is Chekov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, and Sulu who is Chinese, but no Iraqis. He is very upset.

He doesn't understand why there aren't any Iraqis on Star Trek."

President Bush laughed, leaned toward the Iraqi ambassador and whispered back, "It's because it takes place in the future."

 

[Shovelbuck]

Thanks for adding a laugh to my day! That's funny!

 

[Wiggleworm]

Thanks for giving me a chuckle Rack. Its been a tough day.

 

[ironwood]

Thanks Rack

Shovel, I think that's Muddy's banna you are shooting at.

 

[Husker]

The Irish War with Saddam...

Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, Mr. Hussein!", a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy,down at the Harp Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!"

"Well, Paddy," Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"

"Right now," said Paddy, after a moment's calculation, "there is, myself, my cousin Sean, my next door neighbor Seamus, and the entire dart team from the
pub. That makes eight!"

Saddam paused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Begorra!", said Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!"

Sure enough, the next day, Paddy called again. "Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Saddam asked.

"Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor."

Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to 1-1/2 million since we last spoke."

"Saints preserve us!" said Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you."

Sure enough, Paddy rang again the next day. "Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified Harrigan's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the Shamrock Pub have joined us as well!"

Saddam was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 1,000 bombers and 2,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And
since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!", said Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back."

Sure enough, Paddy called again the next day. "Top o' the mornin', Mr.Hussein! I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Well," said Paddy, "we've all had a long chat over a bunch of pints, and decided there's no fookin' way we can feed two million prisoners after they surrender!"

God Bless the Irish!