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20-21 Team Contest Sign Up

It's been a few years since I've participated. So I'll try it this year.

I'd recommend sending Curtis some bribe money unless you want to be stuck with me as a team member. In fact, I recommend IW starts an auction with the lowest bidders being assigned to a team with me on it.
 
Hope you have another place to hunt Bonker. I don't allow competitive hunting on my land. Kidding! Sign me up too then. Bonker and I have to be on the same team so I can make sure he cheats fairly. Just trying to protect the integrity of this contest. Any other old guys want to be on our team?
 
turkeyriver said:
.....so I can make sure he cheats fairly.
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You taught me everything I know about cheating, but not everything you know, so if anybody is going to catch me cheating, it would be you.

Wait a second, maybe I should bribe Curtis to keep you off my team.... Can you feel the love?
 
Hey guys, I’ll post the teams tomorrow. If you still want in sign up tonight and during the day tomorrow. Everyone is welcome.


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JNRBRONC said:
If the old farts Bonker and TurkeyRiver need someone, I might be willing to hold them back.
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No fart like an old fart.

I was up helping TR check his stands a week or three ago. He didn't know it but I had a broccoli, cauliflower, baked bean and sauerkraut casserole for supper the night before. He has some killer stands that I won't hunt from because they are indeed killer stands and not in the good sense of the term. Any time a guy has to be half orangutan and half contortionist to gain access to a stand it is indeed a "killer stand". But he does it year after year after year and he kills nice bucks from those stands year after year after year and has yet to take a tumble out of any of them.

I needed to do something to try and break his cycle. It was with that thought that I made the casserole the night before I went up to help him. Unfortunately, the casserole started working while I was still in bed. I was banished to the guest bedroom. My plan was to let all of my now toxic gas loose in the area around his killer stands in an effort to break his cycle. My gas lingers so long in an area that it should be good until next January. The up side for me is the stands I frequent will have more deer traffic than his and perhaps I'll start a cycle of my own.

The next morning I was up in God's country before sunrise. TR was happy to see me so early. Little did he know I was early because I couldn't hold the gas any longer and needed to start off gassing before I exploded. The first stand we checked was of course one I liked to sit in. I didn't decompress in that area and my pressure gauge was definitely in the red. Next stop, one of his best spots. He climbed up and I let it go. One thing I forgot was hot air rises. He was sitting in the stand about 300' off the ground. I heard him start to cough. He couldn't catch his breath. "What's wrong?" I asked. He replied "I think the hog confinement building must have a manure leak and they must have thrown about 200 dead pigs in the field." He eventually was able to climb back down. He looked at the wilted plants in the area, he looked at me and immediately knew what was going on. But I felt much better.

Since he figured out my plan the next six stands we checked were stands I liked to hunt from. The pressure was building back up to dangerous levels. Ever wonder what the function of the appendix is? No, it's not something at the end of a book, it is a blind sac that hangs off your colon. Its function is to act as a relief valve of sorts so when pressure builds in your colon the pressure can be relived some by your appendix expanding. My appendix was close to rupturing. I think the only thing that saved my appendix was TR had other places to be that day so time was running out.

The next three stands were all in the killer category. I would stand below and marvel at his ape like ability to get into those stands. It is truly a marvel to behold. I've always wondered why he eats so many freakin bananas. "Were" is the key term here. I left enough toxic waste behind to make those stands into the next Love Canal.

So JNR, I can cook up another big 'ol casserole and help you with your stands too.
 
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