Goodbye to a dear friend

T

Treehopper

Guest
I found out last night that our oldest dog "Maggie" has Cancer, the vet put her on some medicines that will allow her to be pain free for a week or so. After that I will need to put her down.

She is the best dog I have ever owned, the real issue is she is my sons pride and joy. They have been almost inseperable since he was born. The dog has always looked after him and he her once he was old eneugh.

Any advice on how to break it to him, Damn this is hard on me to, but I worry about him. I wont tell him until the day before I put her down but he has no clue how sick she is.

Thanks for any advice, not sure why I posted. I just needed to talk about it and would appreciate any advice.
 
Dean,
That sucks. How old is your son? I also will have to have this conversation with my kids when the time comes for my Maggie Mae (Black Lab). She is 11. I don't have any advice for you other than take it as an opportunity to teach him about the cycle of life. It is a jagged pill but one that is part of our existence. Keep the good times close and remember them often. I can't imagine what a mess I am going to be when that time comes but I guess I knew that when I got her. Take Care. There are a few fellas on here that have been through it.
 
Bummer for sure. When my vizsla passed my dad simply sat me down and told me, but I was in college and I was smart enough to see it coming when I had to carry her a mile back to the truck on her last hunt.

Being he's in a hunting family at least he is familiar with death in some form, break it gentle and be there for support. Sorry for what's coming down the pipe.
 
He is nine, she is thirteen. Funny story or at least I think so. I remember when we first brought Matt home from the hospital. ( He must have been 3 -4 days old) My mom stopped to visit, my wife left the room to go get something in the kitchen, mom went to pick Matt up. Maggie would not let her near Matt. She knew my mom really well but must have known how much Matt meant to us. As soon as Connie returned to the room, it was ok for mom to pick Matt up. She has always been his shadow.
 
Sorry to hear about yor dog. I know all too well your situation as I went through it very recently. How old is your son?

My 3 yr old very much liked our black lab that died and he is certain she is playing in the bushes. HIs mom tried explain things to him and he had none of it, she was playing in the bushes. For now we're intent on letting him think this in hopes her memory will eventually fade.
confused.gif
 
My daughter was 9 when I had my setter put down, it's gonna be tough Dean. Personally I would allow him some quiet time with his buddy before she departs. All us dog lovers still have that special memory of our first dog, the memories and heart break. Break out the old photos, my wife put a scrapbook together for me and it's nice just to page through it and just say hello to your old friend.

Hang tough.
 
Treehopper you might try this, he might be old enough to understand. I read this on another site not long after having to put our Btitt Lady down a few years ago. It might help all of you.


Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...
 
My deepest sympathy. I know how hard it is to lose a beloved best friend. I lost a great dog named Maggie to an apparent heart attack while chasing a great blue heron. She was a golden retreiver & only 4years old.

I don't have much advice for breaking the news but it is a reality of life. He probably should know as soon as possible so he can prepare himself & make the best of his time with her. I wouldn't wait. The best rememdy for me was to get another pup a couple of months later to fill the void. There's nothing better than a great dog for a companion.
 
I'm so sorry to read this, I lost my best friend diamond two months on saturday with an apparent heart attack while at the vets office, she was my first dog and it tore me up.
Your son is old enough to realize the truth, be honest and open so he doesn't hate you for hiding somthing. This will be very hard on your family. I would suggest for you and your wife to take friday off so you will have a couple of days to start the healing process. You will not want to be around many people. I have a couple acres around my house and I have Diamond buried in a flower and bush garden I built where she liked to watch the neighborhood from. I greet her everyday, and it's good for my soul. When its time to look for a new best friend, don't look to replace her so to speak as much as to find a new relationship if that make sense, you will never find exactly what you had so don't try to. Let a new relationship blossom, and keep the happy memories close to your heart.
May you find comfort in Gods touch.
Jeff~
 
Thats too bad. They are part of the family and you make such a special bond with them. The neighbor next to my shop had a wolf/huskie mix (70% wolf) and she passed away on Tuesday in her sleep. She wasn't mine but I loved playing with her everyday I came to work. They make life a lot of fun and are great companions. I hope your talk with your son goes well and I am sorry for your loss.
 
Sorry to hear this. My only advise is to not wait till the end to tell him. Give him atleast a couple of days to cherish with his best friend. When I was a kid my dad gave me about an hour with my collie before taking her on a long drive and I was heartbroken. Crazy as it sounds, I had so much I wanted to tell her and wanted to just hug her to death for a while and never really got the chance. I was 8 or 9 at the time and I was mad at my dad for what seemed like years for being so cold about it.
 
Sorry to hear about your loss, one of the worst feelings in the world when you lose a dog. The good memories they leave you with will help you and your boy get through this tough time.
 
Treehopper, I don't know what your plans are for burial but if you have a place at home or close by it would probably help you son. I don't think I would have him there when the vet put his dog to sleep but you should involve him honestly in the process and the burial if possible. If he just sees you take his pal away and never knows what has happened it will be much harder on him. As parents we all want to protect our children more that we should but that doesn't really do them any favors. You might even let your son pick a place to bury his dog, maybe in a place that was special to them that he can visit when ever he wants. Lastly, both allow him to and help him to grieve this loss as it is proably his first real loss.
 
This post brought tears to my eyes. you guys lucky enough to be able to bury a loved one on a special place are very fortunate...a small thing to be cherished.

Good Luck.
 
[ QUOTE ]
Treehopper, I don't know what your plans are for burial but if you have a place at home or close by it would probably help you son. I don't think I would have him there when the vet put his dog to sleep but you should involve him honestly in the process and the burial if possible.You might even let your son pick a place to bury his dog, maybe in a place that was special to them that he can visit when ever he wants.

[/ QUOTE ] Well said. I'm sorry to hear about your dog. We go visit "Buster" on the timber hill every spring where we mushroom hunt. We made a homemade timber cross for a marker and my boys always stop to remember what a good dog he was. They think Buster makes sure it's their lucky mushroom spot.
grin.gif
A few months after his passing we got a black lab pup "Scooter" and he is their new best friend but Buster is far from forgotten. My thoughts are with you .
 
[ QUOTE ]
it's gonna be tough Dean. Personally I would allow him some quiet time with his buddy before she departs.

[/ QUOTE ]

i agree. good luck
 
that is a sad situation. those critters get very close to us dont they?
best of luck and i hope the talk with your boy goes well.
Man's best friend!!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top